Girl Laying on Top of Guy Back Down

Sometimes you want to have sex standing up. Other times you want to lie back and let your partner work their magic. On other occasions, you crave a kinky position, or one that lets your partner go really (really) deep. Then there are those moments when you just want ~all~ the control. When those dominant feels strike, there's only one course of action to take: Get on top.

A woman-on-top sex position will let you dictate the depth and angle of penetration, as well as the speed. Plus it may help you reach orgasm more easily, says Reba Thomas, a sex educator and CEO of Sexpert Consultants, a company that specializes in adult sex health education.

"Being on top feels great for people with clitorises because over 70 percent of people with vulvas require external clitoral stimulation to reach orgasm," she said. "When you're on top and you lean forward, the friction helps awaken the clitoral cluster. And when you're more aroused, the pleasure is better for everyone."

You also enjoy a lot of versatility on top, points out Jess O'Reilly, PhD, sexologist and host of the @SexWithDrJess Podcast. "If you're an exhibitionist, you can play with these fantasies while your body is in full view and you can also enjoy the many benefits of eye contact with your partner," she says. "You might use eye contact to enhance intimacy, convey desire and pleasure, or experiment with dominance and submission."

And, if you like to use toys, you can reach down and make room for a vibrator to stimulate your clitoris even more, says sex therapist Debra Laino, DHS.

But being on top doesn't mean you have to default to doing cowgirl. In fact, there are actually 20 different woman-on-top positions for you to get creative with while riding your partner's penis (or a strap-on), and plenty of these allow for additional stimulation like nipple play with your free hands or a vibrator.

There are a few tricks to make your woman on top experience even better.

For starters, there's getting into position. Tyomi Morgan, certified sexologist, pleasure coach, and creator of The Cowgirl Workout recommends being "direct and playful" here. "Whispering phrases like 'I want ride you now,' 'let me ride that [fill in the blank,]' or 'please let me climb on top,' express desire and are direct expressions," she says. "Asking for what you want can sometimes feel nerve-wracking, but being clear about what you desire is the simplest way to [get what you want]."

As for actually getting into position, O'Reilly says "there's no right way," but there are a few things you can do to make it sexier. "You might hold your partner's hands above their head while you mount them, or you might roll them over and climb aboard," she says.

When it comes to movement, it's really up to you. "Many women get pleasure by grinding on a penis," Laino says. "So, slow rhythmic movements." You can put your hands on your partner's chest (or knees if you're facing away from them) for stability. Then, once you've got a groove going reach down pleasure yourself at the same time.

Ultimately, O'Reilly says, it's best to do what feels good to you. "Don't emulate what you see in porn, but move your body in a way that produces pleasure," she says. "Rather than focusing on how you look, tune in to how you feel."

How to make the woman on top position more comfortable.

There are three main issues that might contribute to women feeling uncomfortable on top, says Shawntres A. Parks, PhD, LMFT, Women's Health advisory board member. "One is self-esteem," she says. "On top, your partner has a pretty unobstructed view of your body and, for women who are suffering from body image issues or aren't feeling confident, it can feel uncomfortable."

Another is lack of experience. "People don't necessarily know what to do when they're on top or how to move to create a pleasurable experience for themselves and/or their partner," Parks says.

Woman on top positions also may not physically be comfortable for everyone, says O'Reilly, citing "pressure against your knees or cervix" as common issues.

To make your experience more physically comfortable, O'Reilly suggests making a few adjustments. "Put extra pillows beneath your knees or lean forward to support yourself using the headboard," she says. You can also change angles to reduce pressure against your cervix, like leaning forward or turning to face your partner's feet. Even changing locations, like moving to a couch, where there's more stability and things to grab onto can help, Parks says.

If you've never done woman on top before, experts say now is a good time to start. "You can control the movement and your pleasure," Parks says. And if you're feeling self-conscious about your body (totally normal) see if you can lean into those feel-good feelings that come with the agency of being on top, it might help you reframe those downer thoughts and allow you to embrace the moment and how beautiful you look and feel.

Give yourself the chance to mix things up, O'Reilly adds. "It can be fun to experiment with being on top, even if it's brand new to you, as you can control the movements, rhythm, pressure, depth, angles, and speed to really take what you like," she says. "You'll also have a view of your lover's face and may enjoy their reactions."

Want to get started tonight? To give you inspiration for your next sex sesh, here are some of the best woman-on-top positions, according to these sexperts.

1. Seated Wheelbarrow

Emily Schiff-Slater

Get in there and ride it however you want, while giving your partner a nice view of your booty. "You can move forward and back, side-to-side, giving you a different range of sensations," Parks says. "You get to control the tempo and depth of penetration." This move can also allow you to grind against your clitoris, O'Reilly points out.

Do it: Have your partner sit at the edge of a bed or chair. Then, sit on their lap and plant your hands on the floor. Stretch your legs behind their waist and go for it.

2. Upstanding Citizen

Emily Schiff-Slater

This position "can create extra friction and tightness against your [labia] and clitoris, which is perfect for a grinding orgasm," O'Reilly says. Parks points out that you're not going to have as much control here, given that your partner will be holding your weight, but "both partners can move in tandem and have a great time."

Do it: Straddle your seated partner, wrapping your legs around their body. They stand and support you in their arms while you pump away.

3. Lazy Man

Emily Shiff-Slater

You're in total control with this position. "It's a good way to experiment beyond basic woman on top," Parks says. The Lazy Man can help you "modulate tempo and depth, and get plenty of leverage," she says. Your partner will also "get a great view of [themselves or their strap-on] sliding in and out of you," O'Reilly says.

Do it: Have your partner sit on the bed, with their back supported by pillows and legs outstretched. Straddle their waist, with your feet on the bed. Then, bend your knees to lower yourself onto them, using one hand to direct the penis or strap-on in.

4. Wrapped Lotus

Emily Schiff-Slater

You'll get up close and personal in this highly intimate position. "It's almost like an extended hug," Parks says. "There's an emotional and physical intimacy hybrid." You can also control the action by using your partner for leverage to move up and down by leaning back.

Do it: Have your partner sit cross-legged and climb into their lap, facing them. Wrap your legs around their back. Then, have your partner enter you and grind up against their pelvis.

5. Face-Off

EMILY SCHIFF-SLATER

From this position, you're totally in control of the angle and depth of penetration, says Thomas. "The person on top has control over how they're being penetrated and because the bodies are so close, there's bound to be friction on the external part of the clitoris." Not only that, but your hands are also 100 percent free to do as they please–whether it shows your clit some love or get fun and handsy with your partner's erogenous zones. "Curl and thrust the hips forward to hit the G spot and stroke the clitoris at the same time," Morgan recommends.

Do it: Your partner sits on a chair or the edge of the bed; you face them, seated on their lap.

6. Cowgirl

EMILY SCHIFF-SLATER

"This is one of the most vibrator-friendly positions," says Thomas. This classic woman-on-top position puts you in total control, and you can try adding a little spice by incorporating a couples vibrator like Eva or by playing around with how wide you spread your legs. If you want to level up the action, try holding your partner's hands above their head or tying them up. You can even experiment with blindfolds and nipple play, Laino adds.

Do it: You kneel on top, pushing off your partner's chest and sliding up and down their thighs. You can relieve some of your weight from their pelvis by leaning back and supporting yourself on their thighs.

Real talk: Does the G-spot really exist? Here's what some real women think:

7. Cowgirl's Helper

EMILY SCHIFF-SLATER

The Cowgirl's Helper puts less stress on your legs, making reaching that sweet, sweet orgasm way less strenuous (score!). You can also try alternating between shallow penetration by leaning forward and deep thrusting by sitting up straighter to target different parts of your vagina, like your G-spot, says Thomas. Another option: "Sit all the way down and rock your hips from front to back. Picture yourself sensually riding a rocking horse for this move...it's weird, but it works," O'Reilly says.

Do it: Similar to the popular Cowgirl sex position, you kneel on top, pushing off your partner's chest and sliding up and down the thighs. But your partner helps by supporting some of your weight and grabbing your hips or thighs while they rise to meet each thrust.

8. Reverse Cowgirl

EMILY SCHIFF-SLATER

This is a great variation on classic Cowgirl. Again, it lets you take control of the pace and angle of thrusts. If you want to add some extra stimulation, Thomas recommends asking your partner to shift their position a bit. "You can enhance this position by asking the penetrating partner to bend their knees, which will allow you to stimulate your clitoris." Their thighs will create the perfect surface to rub your clit against during sex. Yes, please.

Do it: Your partner lies on their back; you straddle them, facing their feet.

9. Champagne Room

EMILY SCHIFF-SLATER

This position, while allowing you to regulate just how fast and intense the sex is going to be, works for both vaginal and anal sex. Plus, your hands are free to roam and stimulate your clit, your partner's inner thighs, or even their anus for double (or triple) the pleasure, says Thomas. You can also slow things down for a naughty vibe. "Alternate between five slow strokes and 10 quick ones just for fun," O'Reilly.

Do it: Your partner sits and you sit on top of them, facing away.

10. The Om

EMILY SCHIFF-SLATER

If you want to slow things down and have intimate, sensual sex, opt for The Om. Try rocking, rather than thrusting in this position—not only will it stimulate your clit, but it will also gradually build up to an epic finale for both of you. Bonus: You get some seriously sexy eye contact with this one which is major for intimacy. Thomas says this setup also makes it easier to find a flow. "Creating a steady and consistent rhythm, which is key for many people to reach orgasm, is easy in this position." O'Reilly agrees. "Grind against their pubic bone to rub your clitoris," she adds.

Do it: Your partner sits cross-legged (yoga/pretzel-style), you sit in their lap facing them. Wrap your legs around them and hug each other for support.

11. The Lazy Man

EMILY SCHIFF-SLATER

This position puts you in control and maintains plenty of intimacy. Think of your partner's pelvis as a masturbatory tool, something to rub and stimulate your clitoris with and against. "Rock back and forth to create pressure against your [vulva]," O'Reilly says. To make this position even hotter, Thomas recommends adding in some nipple play. "If your partner stimulates your breasts in this position by sucking, licking, or massaging, that can increase arousal and pleasure for you both."

Do it: Place pillows behind your partner's back and have them sit on the bed with legs outstretched. Now straddle their waist, feet on the bed. Bend your knees to lower yourself onto them, using one hand to direct the penis or strap-on in. Just by pressing on the balls of your feet and releasing them, you can raise and lower yourself onto the shaft as slowly or as quickly as you please.

12. Pretzel Dip

EMILY SCHIFF-SLATER

Think of this sex position as doggy style, except with eye contact and a pretty good view of your partner's body. Aside from being great for penetration with a penis or strap-on, Thomas says this position is also pretty ideal for getting handsy. "The Pretzel Dip is a great position for stimulating the clitoris either with a hand, toy, or thigh." You can also work your nipples, Laino points out.

Do it: Have your partner lie on their right side; then kneel, straddling your right leg and curling your left leg around their left side.

13. Leap Frog

EMILY SCHIFF-SLATER

If you live for deep penetration, add this to your list of go-to's. "Leap Frog with an arched back is great for deep penetration," says Thomas, who adds that you can up the intensity of this position by stimulating the tip of the clitoris to ensure maximum arousal. Try a clitoral toy if manual stimulation doesn't do the trick, Laino suggests.

Do it: This is a modified doggy-style. Have your partner get on their hands and knees, then, keeping their hips raised, enter them from behind with your finger or strap-on.

14. Valedictorian

EMILY SCHIFF-SLATER

This position may put both of your flexibilities to the test. This move allows for deep penetration, stimulation of the clit, and lots of grinding. Thomas adds that the friction against the vulva can also make this position worth the extra effort.

Do it: From missionary position, your partner raises their legs and extends them straight out (forming a "V").

15. The Spider

EMILY SCHIFF-SLATER

From this seated position, you get to watch all the sexy action. Plus, you can also try taking it a step further by placing your partner's legs on your shoulders, which will make it easier for you to thrust and move your hips in circles. Want to make it even hotter? Reach down and stimulate your partner's clitoris, says Thomas, or their nipples or inner thighs.

Do it: Sit on the bed with legs toward one another, arms back to support yourselves. Now move together so your genitals are touching, or enter them with your strap-on. Their hips will be between your spread legs, your knees bent, and feet outside of their hips and flat on the bed. Now rock back and forth.

16. Missionary

EMILY SCHIFF-SLATER

Sometimes you just gotta go with what you know. The missionary position is a tried and true position for many couples. Thomas suspects it's such a popular position because it allows women to rub their clitorises up against their partners. That, and it's one that's ideal for eye contact if you're looking to add some intimacy to your sex.

Do it: Do I really need to spell this one out? Okay. Have them lie on their back while you lie facedown on top of them.

17. Magic Mountain

EMILY SCHIFF-SLATER

Okay, so maybe you're not on top, per se, but you are in control. You get to decide how much you rub your clitoris against your partner's pelvis. Plus, because you're facing each other, this position helps you feel really connected not only physically, but emotionally too. "The eye contact in this position really adds to the intimacy and helps partners focus on the here and now and what's happening between their bodies," says Thomas.

Do it: Your partner sits, legs bent, leaning back on their hands and forearms. You do the same and then inch toward them until you make contact.

18. Golden Arch

EMILY SCHIFF-SLATER

You'll be the one in complete control over the depth, speed, and angle of the thrusts. "This position is great for exploring which types of strokes and depth of penetration really does it for you," says Thomas. From this position, you can also easily lean back farther for some extra G-spot stimulation, and you (or your partner) have easy access to your clit.

Thomas's pro-tip is to make sure you arch your back while in this position. "Arching your back can change the angle that the penis [or strap-on] comes in contact with the vaginal wall and internal parts of the clitoris," she explains.

Do it: Your partner sits with their legs straight and you sit on top of them with bent knees on top of their thighs, and you both lean back.

19. The Chairman

EMILY SCHIFF-SLATER

This sex position is great for that G-spot love. Plus, your hands are both free for some sexy stroking. "Reach down and use your hands to touch yourself or show them how to touch you with your hands," O'Reilly says. This position is ideal for exploring different angles of penetration. "Leaning forward or back changes angles and can help you and your partner find out what works for you both," Thomas adds.

Do it: Your partner sits on the edge of the bed and you sit on them, facing away.

20. Woman Astride

EMILY SCHIFF-SLATER

Target your G-spot while maintaining control over the speed and depth of thrusts. And, from this reclined position, it's an obvious invitation for your partner to stroke away at your clit and play with your breasts. says Thomas, so "give them the love they deserve," she adds. You can even get down in front of a mirror for a kinky vibe, Laino says.

Do it: This position is just like Cowgirl, but with a twist. Climb on top and have your partner enter you. Then, lean back and place your hands on the bed for support, creating a 45-degree angle with your partner's legs.

Jasmine Gomez Associate Lifestyle editor Jasmine Gomez is the associate lifestyle editor at Women's Health and covers health, fitness, sex, culture and cool products.

Korin Miller Korin Miller is a freelance writer specializing in general wellness, sexual health and relationships, and lifestyle trends, with work appearing in Men's Health, Women's Health, Self, Glamour, and more.

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Girl Laying on Top of Guy Back Down

Source: https://www.womenshealthmag.com/sex-and-love/a19925956/new-sex-styles/

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